Of pink bedsheets, young philosophers and an unexpected afternoon...

During my internship at the office of Udayan Care, I get the chance to visit the Udayan Ghar in Sant Nagar, a foster home accommodating twelve girls. A personal impression 

I ring the bell with mixed expectations. I´ve heard praise about the Udayan Ghars from literally all the staff, seen the long list of awards the organisation received – but from experience I know that despite being praised and awarded, an NGO might still fail or simply not care to improve the situation of its target group. So I try to keep my hopes down, but still I can´t help to secretly wish that this time it will be different.

Well, it is. The door is opened by a young woman, who, as I will learn later, is one of the caregivers that constantly live with the girls. I get a short impression of a large, well-lit flat, several beds covered with pink bedspreads, then I am asked to sit down, being successively offered water, lunch and chai and introduced to the Home´s coordinators, Preeti and Poonam. A few girls are roaming around, giving me curious looks and shy smiles. The others are just returning from school, changing out of their school uniforms and grabbing lunch – before starting to study again. They are supported by a few private teachers who arrive soon after to sit with two children each and help them with their homework, making them spell out long English words or the Hindi numbers from 1 to 50. I am instantly impressed by the children´s ambition, unable to remember any time in my own childhood when I mustered enough working spirit to get down to homework immediately after school.

It turns out that the kids aren´t as different from myself as I thought, they are simply about to give exams. Everyone is trying to store as much knowledge in their head as possible. So it´s not surprising that the next question I am asked is “Could you help me with my English homework?”. The inquiry comes from Surja, a lively 15-year old girl, who wants to become an architect, but, in my eyes, would be better suited as a philosopher. Her English is way better than she herself believes and her thoughts surprisingly profound for a teenager´s. Her English task is it to write about the role of school in a child´s life, but we soon end up in a discussion about individuality.

“School is important because you can compare yourself to other students, you can understand in which ways you have to become better. This is what my teacher told me.”

“Well, she is right, but it is also important to realize your own strengths. To understand that you are great as you are, even if you are not like others.”

“I also think like this! Today in class I was laughing at a joke my friend told me, and then my teacher asked me to follow my desk neighbour´s example and sit quietly like her. I told her that if everyone becomes like my desk neighbour, then we all will be the same, and the world would be really boring.”

“Well, what did your teacher reply to this?”

“She glanced at me angrily and left the room.”

Surja chuckles, I smile, and then we share a laugh that doesn´t only break, but instantly remove the ice.  She gifts me toffees and introduces me to her foster sister Divya. Both of them moved into the Home around three years ago, and both of them love it. “It´s like a true family, I feel at home”, Surja emphasises, and Divya adds: “Here we get everything that wasn´t available at home, like proper food, toys, and nice clothes. And they even celebrate our birthdays!”.

 Divya is mentally challenged and attends a special school that concentrates on simple arts, music and self-expression. I think of other orphanages for disabled children where the inhabitants are beaten and chained to chairs when they don´t listen to their teachers. I think of the institutions for homeless children in which they are kept like animals in factory farming, sent to low quality government schools, aren´t provided more than the necessities for survival - not even to speak of emotional care. In contrast, the Udayan kids receive a psychological therapy to cope with their past traumata, they have mentor parents who take them out for movies and three caregivers at the house whom they can ask for support.

And, not to forget, they have a home that deserves its name. Tired from studying, Surja shows me around, and my last doubts dissolve. There are three large bedrooms, each of them occupied by two to four girls, equipped with coolers and wardrobes. Each child has a locker for their personal belongings, which they decorated individually – in Surja´s case, with lists of equations from her favourite subject, math. Next, there is a kitchen in which one of the caregivers is preparing chai. Bathrooms, as clean, neat and friendly as the rest of the flat. An office in which the children attend computer tuitions and which also serves as the caregiver’s bedroom. And the living room where we were sitting earlier, equipped with study tables, a modern TV, and a balcony. While I am taking in the space and light, trying to imagine how this must seem to a child that has spent its former life in poverty, Surja is still talking like a waterfall. She tells me about their trip to Nainital and her rock climbing experience, about her friend´s elder brother who was admitted in one of the most prestigious universities of India and her dream to also make it to there one day, about her favourite sport, Badminton. She shows me the book she is currently reading – a volume of Enid Blyton´s “Five friends” series, and asks my opinion on a never-ending list of Bollywood actors. In between, a girl of maybe four years enters and starts imitating a cat´s voice, asking for Surja´s attention. She receives a tight hug, the affection between both visible on their faces.

Surja´s stream of words is only interrupted by Poonam, the coordinator, who starts a friendly conversation with me. She is a former teacher who smiles a lot and laughs heartily. When I inquire about her motivation to live with a bunch of children with only a few holidays every month, she replies “I want to give something to other people. Today´s society is becoming very cold and individualistic, but I think everyone who can should give something back and support others. This is why I decided to care for these children.”

When I finally have to leave, after another cup of Chai and repeated promises to visit again, I close the door rather reluctantly. It´s only been a few hours, but I have grown fond of the children and want to stay longer. I think about the doubts I had about the foster home and realize that they were unfounded. It´s not exaggerated to say that Udayan Care turns the children´s lives around till they face a bright future. The girls I met are happy, lively, self-conscious persons, not the neglected or abused children they had been before coming to Udayan Care. They are worried about their exams, not about filling their stomach, fancying movie stars and enjoying their free time, not working the whole day for a meagre earning. The Udayan Ghars, from all I have seen, can easily serve as a model for similar institutions. I honestly wish that they will be able to reach out to more and more children in future to give them a childhood they deserve.

Josephine Valeske